The big 2-8!

Yup, I am 28 today. In reality, this age means little to me. Nothing really changes...no insurance break or driver's liscense renewal, etc. So, the reality is that this is just another day. That being said, I LOVE my birthday. Even if I just end up treating it like any other day, I LOVE that there is just one day "devoted" to me. Technically, I could do more to make the day exciting and special, but that generally costs more money than I have to spend...especially this year.

So, in hopes of NOT sounding too "doomsday," I am going to dedicate a whole blog post just to me. I have put a little thought into the words that I want to say, but I really have no idea what will actually come out. I am ok with my spontaneous thoughts, though, I just hope they come out clear and not sad.

As with most people on their birthdays, I have been asked a lot, "So, do you feel another year older?" Again, the reality of this question is difficult and complex for me to answer, which lead to many thoughts throughout the last week, which lead to this post.

I will start with physically. I was roughly 155-158 pounds throughout high school. I was always so active with my jobs and activities that I never really gained weight. I was about 5'11'' and had light brown with sun-streaked blonde highlights. My eyes alternated between shades of green, hazel, and blue. Through the years little has changed. I am now 10 years older than when I graduated high school; I have fluctuated anywhere from 160-191 pounds depending on pregnancies; I still have eyes that fluctuate between shades of green, hazel, and blue; and I think that I am still about 5'11''. I am not sure on the height. I feel like I am shrinking, but I still have issues finding tall jeans, so that leads me to believe that I am the same height. For hair color, thanks to a wonderful crazy college room mate, my hair has now been changed from light brown to shades of blonde, red, purple, and ravinish. The point being is that physically, I feel the absolute same as I did at high school graduation. Currently, at 156 pounds, I am in probably the best physical shape that I have ever been in thanks to total dedication to running and working out. I admit, when I first started working out after I had Ryan, it sucked. I dreaded it every single day. Now, that hour or 1.5 hours in the morning is one of the best parts of my day. I can now run anywhere from 4-6 miles without thinking about it and 7-9 miles with effort and dedication. Never in my life would I have thought that I would be able to do that. In middle AND high school, running a mile would kill me. I am very grateful for this new love I have found and more importantly, I am very grateful for my excellent health.

Next, I will move on to emotionally and mentally. Now this is the aspect that, when asked if I feel older, I can respond with a HECK YES!! I am not sure if I will even be able to put into words how I feel in this area. If one looks at the experiences that I have had in life dealing with death, births, drama of friends, car accidents, settling estates because of death, etc. (I am sure the list can go on), then I have been through more than most at my age 28. I am not trying to gain sympathy or belittle anyone else's problems. Simple fact is that, I have been through alot. Because of these experiences, struggles, and lessons learned, I can honestly answer to the emotional and mental side of my age that I feel at the minimum 35 and at the oldest 55...I know; it's a large range, but I have good days and bad days.

Now all that being said, I repeat, I love my birthdays. For this birthday, it truly was just a routine day. I took children to preschool; I did dishes and cleaned my kitchen; I picked kids up from preschool; I went fabric shopping and grocery shopping; I took RJ to lunch; I went to young women's in the evening; and then since my birthday fell on the seond Tuesday of the month, I went to Girls Night out. Now, what was special about my day. At Wal-mart, I saw so many incredible and amazing women that I am blessed enough to call friends...I never see anyone when I go shopping. At JoAnn's I was able to score big because of coupons and their sales. It was just a great day.

So where does this lead? Plain and simple. I am content with my life. It has thrown so many unexpected turns at me. Because of that, I often feel like I need to introduce myself to people, "Hi, my name is Jennifer Walker. I am 28 years old. I have experienced these deaths, these trials, these joys, etc."

And THAT is where this post has lead. Kind of pointless? yes. But it will suffice.